On getting started

On getting started
Taking the first step on a journey is perhaps, the most challenging part.
when a train is about to start, if you put a stone below each of the wheels, the train wont start. The same train, going 60 mph can smash into a concrete wall 5 meters thick! Thats the power of momentum.
The amount of energy a space vehicle spends to get out of the gravitational orbit of the earth is much more than the energy required for the entire remaining trip!
There are so many things on your 'to do' list that you are just not being able to get started on.You're waiting for the right time, the right condition, the right resources, the right people, the right everything - before you start. And you keep planning to start. But nothing happens.
What is really happening here?
There are so many ways you try and push yourself to do things.So there is mental dialogue. "I should do this. I need to do this. Let me get motivated to do this. Yes I am motivated to do this".The other way is to do some self bashing "You better do this or else..."
This is an attempt to generate a lot of motivation to do, at a feeling level. You might even get started taking a few steps in the euphoria. But then, the entire effort fizzles. There are so many blogs that start with a lot of zest and then fizzle. Its like taking the first step with all your strength, doing a 100 meter sprint and then falling down.
The other way you cope with this procrastination is to think through the first step. You think through mentally the benefits of what will happen if your write. You try and summon up your discipline to write. You think through how will you go about writing. You try and park your emotions of laziness and resistence and go about writing. And you get started.
Yet another way is the NLP-Tony Robbins way. You associate 'massive pain' with not writing and a lot of 'pleasure' with writing. You get leverage on yourself by magnifiying your pain of not writing - running the most terrible images in your mind for not writing. You could also try to think of a time when you were actually in the 'flow' and try and recreate that feeling...
So what is the approach that works? I think the final combination of what works is this : It is a mix of ALL of these methods, customized to what works for you. Which means, you try all of these, not one at a time but together. This maximises thier impact.
Its like at a war, you first send out everything - your foot soldiers, your tanks, your airforce. Then you assess whats working the best - and then send more of it.
So you try everything and be very sensitized to whats working best for you - and then do it even more till the pattern gets totally reinforced for you.
Here is what I do when I want to get started with writing.
I have a small notepad file that I go through each time I am about to start writing. It reads something like this :
"Why am I not motivated enuff to write
I think I must wait for ideas before I writeI am scared of being bored
I have left so many books incomplete that I think that’s what will happen to these as well
Deep within I perhaps believe that I have nothing of value to shareIt’s a delayed gratification without instant resultsI don’t keep the end picture in mind
I am scared of breaking the discipline – because if I start in enthu once again and break the discipline (a pattern that has repeated) then all the time spent in the writing will be a waste ?"
This is no rocket science. Most of the times we know the answers - the obvious ones to why we are procrastinating. Then there are other hidden answers - new ones that will pop up. These are answers that have come out of genuine retrospection. very often we try to gloss over them i.e. try and avoid thinking through them. They keep working at the subconscious level. Try instead, to acknowledge them.
I take the next step by going into this:
" What should I think before I write
+ I will be helping people through my work+ It is self expression+ It will bring me more opportunities to speak and hence sharpen my talents and share even more+ I will love the fame and attention that will come from being an author of like 10 books! Yeah that will truly rock :D"
I think focussing on these two aspects : What is blocking you and what will inspire you, together should get you moving.
The final step thats so cliched in writing is "Just go do it" - but guess what? It works!
Dont wait for inspiration. Dont wait for ideas or thoughts. Realise that there is just no 'right time' to get started!
Just open your word processor and start typing. Before you know it you will be in the "flow". Very similar to swimming - you jump in the water, and soon you learn to float your body...
So now that we have discussed some of these techniques, its time for you to test these! So, I challenge you to get started - RIGHT NOW! Take some action and reinforce what we have just discussed.
See what works for you - and share with me how it worked.
How to make this sustain? Thats another question altogether, and I'll save it for another article.
Tell then, action first. Fire.Ready.Aim.Repeat!

Shanpatti ki chaipatti

Shaanpati ki chaipatti
My friend Arjun gave me a thought that has stuck with me ever since
When you have an iq of 140 dont act as if you have an iq of 160 but as if you have an iq of 120
Thats such an insight! The tendency for the so called intellegentia is to increasingly rely on their own intelligence - and apply it perhaps much more than is needed.
So for example when one of the 'intellegentia' gets into a meeting of the 'normal people' its a scene to watch. I call this a journey from 140 to 80 (someone wt a 140 IQ coming wt junta of 80) - there is almost a paralyzing effect! It feels like a totally different orbit - and that is true for any such 'jump'
But i think its good for a 140 to go into an 80 - it gives some touch of reality, from the high castles and ivory towers that the 140s live in. At the same time the message and communication of a 140 needs to be to an 80 and not to another 140 - there is such temptation to complicate, to go 'deeper' and so on that the message then remains only for the masses. Its like an exclusive language that only a few people can speak and relish in that speaking.
The real challenge is when you can speak in the native language of this planet - and thats 80 not 140. And given that the majority is 80, where does truth in this subjective world sit? You guessed it. 80.

Wallowing in negativity

Wallowing in negativity
I am wallowing in negativity. I dont know what to do about it. I hate the feeling. It tastes bitter. Its like a vaccum in my body that is just absorbing endless pain. What do I do?
I could do many things. I could change my focus by asking the right questions or changing my physiology. I could try EFT. Transcendental meditation is always there. Using NLP I can detach myself out of the situtation.
But I want to choose to listen. I want to experience this pain - however painful it might be. I want to be with the feeling. I want to listen to it. Attentively. I dont want to brush it away.
Becuase it comes with a message. If I dont listen to it, it will try and come back - in another form. It will speak out even louder. Or manifest itself from a voice to something physical. I dont want to dissolve it. Becuase I created it. It is my own creation - and I take full responsiblity for it.
I am just going to let it trickle in - and do whatever it wants to. It might be acid that will rust my parts within. Who knows? It could be the scapel that carves my within into beautiful murals and incarnate carvings. It could be a garden spade digging deeper - so that I may hold more joy when it comes.
I listen to the message. It calms down. There is a sense of resignation. A strange tiredness climbs up. The 'efficient' mind in me is pacing up and down calling this a sheer waste of time and energy. It perhaps is. But what is time really? This negativity takes me into the timeless, just as its partner, pleasure.
It goes but leaving a blemish...a scar...or maybe a beauty spot. It doesnt make me ugly - it only makes me more real. It doesnt create something new - it merely uncovers it.
I wish I could cry it out...but it refuses to leave...it wants to stay...maybe thats love...
It plans to be my guest for a while. We will let it be. We will let it stay. It isnt 'bad' - only another feeling. Its a part of being me - of being human.
I would love to interrogate...to interview...to discover why she is here...
But I think I will just let her be...she needs some rest...
Hush...my thoughts....let her sleep ... let her rest...let her just be...

On questions and answers

On questions and answers
On a daily basis, a number of questions keep popping up in my mind. Here, I am specifically referring to questions about myself, about my life and where I am headed. They do take me away from the present moment, but I take the luxury of entertaining them. I just like 'future pacing' I guess :)
So there are loads of thoughts - and lots of opinions. I read articles and things strike as 'insights'. I could talk to people and find out what they say. I could probably 'meditate' on the answer. Or best of all, I could follow where coincidences lead me - hoping it will be towards the answer
So one might be tempted to believe that the answer is somewhere 'out there' and you need to search for it. But a deeper look at the mechanics of this 'answer seeking' will tell us otherwise.
when I read articles, I only tend to notice that wahts strikingly in favour of or strikingly opposite of what I am planning to do. Talking to people as well, I selectively collect suggestions that typically match my thinking rather than against. Meditation is hearing my own inner voice. Coincidences again my mind will notice that what it has already set in its own mind.
Point I am trying to make is that we manifest confusion in our life out of our own choice. All the while the answer is within us. What you are really looking for is reflection. A candle cant search for light when it has light in itself - it will only realise that when it sees a reflection.
So you can broadcast your questions to the universe and wait for meaningful concidences. But watch what you are thinking...watch waht you are saying and watch your actions. Your actions will show you that you are collecting more data in favour of one of the options - the decision thus is already made, and you are collecting evidence to validate it...
Hence think about it...the answer lies within

Of journeys and destinations

Of journeys and destinations
One fine day after a phone conversation, my long time friend Rajiv concluded. "You have arrived my friend! I am so happy to see you in this mode. At last you are the person you were meant to be. Why didnt you do this earlier?"
His question left me pondering...why didnt I do it earlier? If I knew what it was to be 'myself at true potential' i.e. speaking, writing and enjoying life, why could I not do it earlier? Why could I not switch to that state?
On reflecting I realised that the answer was also in what Rajiv had said. "You have arrived" he said. Moving to any state is a journey - there is no 'direct' switching, though it might seem so. But can a piece of gold suddenly transform itself into jewelery? No. Becuase the journey to becoming the ornament has on its way, the heating and the hitting of the goldsmith. So as wishful as it may seem, a journey cannot be wished away to reach the destination.
When you are approaching a goal, and going through all the ups and downs and the frustrations, know that this is all a part of the journey. It is a necessary journey to take you to where you want to go. For you, there is no other path.
Because, at any time you are doing the best that you can. You are giving all that you have at that particular time. And in doing that, you are carving your path. For each one of us, the path is different. What is important is to have faith that everything that is happening is part of the path, and will lead to the destination eventually.
Its important to be patient with yourself as you travel the path - there is so much of temptation to push yourself to the edge. To try and do more. To beat yourself up when you dont live up to your own expectations. But its all on the path - patience with yourself, the perseverence, the fortitude will see you through
And once you reach the destination, you'll perhaps realise that the destination was another journey in itself. Thats a new story altogether.

Life mein fight hai!

Life Mein Fight Hai
Whosoever told you that life is all easy, smooth and happy was probably kidding. Or hadn't seen life.
Becuase if you really look at it, life is tough. Or challenging if you love transformational vocabulary. And each one of us dreams of or believes in that mystical group of people who probably have no problems, no issues, nothing tough. Such a group of course is ficticious and doesnt exist at all.
The question to ask is why do we consider a 'trouble-free' life as an ideal, as a goal? Why do we want to claim it as a right? Why believe that a 'trouble-free' life is possible?
Event + Response = Outcome
Sure there is this whole body of self help knowledge that says that you can influence what happens in your life through intent. Another philospohy is around how you can choose your response - the meaning you give to the event. I totally subscribe to both of these.
But there is no denying pain.
I remember a close friend, an editor of a personal development magazine in this regard. I had written a article critiquing a particular cult. She immediately rejected the article saying her magazine will carry only 'positive' stuff.
But to see everything as 'positive' and positive alone is denying the very duality of life...the duality of existence. Life is tough and thats how it was meant to be.
Can I then deeply experience pain as honestly as I experience pleasure? Why do I believe that pain is everlasting and pleasure is fleeting? Why dont I see them as tides in the sea of life?
Life is not tough. Life just is. The challenge for us is to be able to embrace both the happy and sad - the joy and the grief with equanimity.
This is for the philosophy part - what is the "HOW" or the "SO WHAT?"
For starters, this doesn't mean that you should focus on pain - quite the opposite, you should keep your focus on whats good. What this mean is do not resist pain. Look at pain as the demand for attention and energy by a particular part of the body or a particular area of life. But for pain, you would not pull your hand away from the fire and burn away. Pain to that extent is a warning signal - you need to ask yourself - "What is the message that this pain brings for me? What do I need to do differently?" The moment you see pain not as pain but as a signal, you suddenly shift the meaning you give it.
Second, stop cribbing and complaining that life is tough. It isnt easy or tough. It just is, and thats how it was meant to be. Its a part of being human - its a package that comes with life. ANd your happiness doesnt depend on how painful or painless your life is. Some of the happiest people in this world are those who have had the most 'difficult' lives. SO even if you believe life is tough, it doesnt give you any right to complain or crib.
Finally, do not believe that any other group of people or person has it any better. Life for each one of us is tough at some level - and easy at another. Each one of us have their own challenges. At one level that may make you feel that you have company. But on the other hand, your issues are yours and only yours. Thats a lonely thought. So count your blessings, but also embrace your pains instead of denying them or sweeping them under the carpet. Remember, for each one of us, pain is a language that the universe talks to us in.
So life may be tough - but that only means life is talking to you. It isnt mute, dumb or deaf.